Most of us can read the handwriting on the wall; we just assume it's addressed to somebody else.

Nothing makes your sense of humor disappear faster than having somebody ask where it is.

A good marriage is like a good trade: Each thinks he got the better deal.

Most of us can forgive and forget; we just don't want the other person to forget that we forgave.

"These days, the wages of sin depend on what kind of deal you make with the publisher."