Every day, people are straying away from the church and going back to God."

"The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it . . . try to fake three laughs in an hour -- ha ha ha ha ha -- they'll take you away, man. You can't."

"All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease and violence, I'd be standing on the breadline right in back of J. Edgar Hoover."

"The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds."

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.